ELIMINATING THE "ENOUGH" QUESTIONS
AND ELIMINATING A SOURCE OF STRESS AND UNHAPPINESS
We waste much of our life energy on tension and stressing about trying to but never reaching "enough".
So, this is both about relieving anxiety but also about freeing up a huge amount of time and effort misused for no real value (if one understands what "enough" is and what "not enough" isn't).
SOME UNDEFINED BOTTOMLESS PIT
Most people have some level of "if I don't have this, then I fall into the oblivion of nothingness and inadequateness".
That is what we call an "undefined and unrealistic no downside limits" delusion!
We create a needless, useless anxiety from our chasing after "unlimited" and always being in a state of "never enough", in our minds, though the reality is that we have already passed "enough" a long time ago.
ENOUGH FOR WHAT?
Will I be "enough"? Enough for what? Wildly popular and adulated, or good enough to be able to be supported by a few tribe members, a few friends, appreciation for life.... Will I still be able to get food and not be kicked out into the jungle to die?
Of course, I will!!
I'm just fine as I am and need not be a superstar or whatever!!
WE MAKE UP A GOAL, AND THEN TURN IT INTO "SOMETHING"
Sometimes a "goal" becomes a "not enough" because I believe it is necessary instead of "nice".
I can get myself upset over not going faster on my mission to make a huge difference for mankind or I can just see it as meaningless in terms of being a need or "required", for I can surely have a good life anyway! (See Me And My Project, at the end of this page.)
AN EXAMPLE OF WRITING A PERSPECTIVE "AFFIRMATION"
"I am sociable and likable enough to be fine in life.
I have a few good friends and that is enough.
In fact, I am far above where I need be.
I can know that I'll be reasonably ok in relationships without any extra effort, just being my normal self, paying enough attention.
I'm just fine. I need nothing more."
Ridiculous, setting all of these deadlines and thinking they are deadlines, instead of optionals....
Musts vs. optionals - there are few musts...
But these make me "more valuable"
As long as you're reasonably proactive (able to go out and create things for oneself) and reasonably knowledgeable in life skills, you will always be at a level far beyond enough! (Notice that becoming "reasonably knowledgeable" is well within your ability level.)
WHAT TO DO WITH THIS
In each area of life, write out your statements like the one above on being social. Write out how you'll be ok and how you've at least got enough and everything above that is a bonus.
Do enough so that you feel fully at peace with this idea.
I recommend that you put this collection behind a tab ("enough") in your Re-Minders Notebook - and that you include it in your daily readings for three weeks and then weekly for awhile. It is a key thing to "install" into your psyche - and free yourself emotionally from needless anxiety and timewise from wasted effort!
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ME AND THIS PROJECT
At times, I catch myself getting into the idea that I "must" get more done on this project and/or I must reach the super-level of helping people.
But the truth is that there is no set mandatory goal. I will simply be at point "x" on the progress line, with no "drop dead" zone of being short of the goal.
What I do is strictly optional and it goes as fast as what will work for a human being such as me. I realize that I love contributing. And I certainly love being "wiser" from doing these studies and this work, as I am able to be much, much happier than I would otherwise have been.
Yes, life, for me, is beautifully sweet. I am living well into BonusLand, far, far beyond my imagination would have thought of and far, far beyond what is required and needed.
I am blessed!!!
